Does post Christmas get you down?

The presents are opened. Thank yous are exchanged. The turkey dinner is done. The friends and family have gone home There should be a feeling of peace and happiness from everyone. Tis the season of good tiddings and all!


          But there isn't     :(


The phenomenon that I have heard referred to as  "The Christmas Letdown"

There is so much build up to Christmas months of prep hours shopping. Time spent decorating and planning, all leading up to one day. The when it is done..... now what?

Often I heard people say "never again". Though the reality is we are creatures of habit, we'll do it again just like last year and the year before.

Why do we have this desire to have one day of the year filled with presents and glitz and so much stuff? Does it make us happier? Maybe for the day but how long does it last? Far too many people have stuff of Christmas day then run out boxing day and buy more stuff. Or exchange what you didn't like to get something better.


Then you have stuff. Does the stuff make you happy? Does it fill you life with joy? Maybe it does for for now but in a week will it still be the best thing ever?

Small and simple Christmas

We really worked hard on decreasing the stuff this year. We didn't make a big deal over Christmas stuff we focused on what was important, FAMILY. It may have been just us but it was one of the best days we have had in awhile. I didn't stress over a fancy dinner, we had meatloaf.

We kept gifts to a minimum and they were mostly useful gifts, books, watches, blankets, PJ's and a few small toys. Honestly unwrapping was done in like 45 minutes. The kids were happy they got what they had wanted. I suppose I'm lucky that they didn't want much. ( definitely an advantage to no TV and homeschooling :) )
We are fortunate that our families are very understanding about our desire to keep the stuff to a minimum. They understand our desire for memories and quality over quantity. :)

Do I feel a sadness that Christmas is over? No. Why not? Because other then a few extra presents, snow and Christmas carols, and a tree we didn't do really anything major. Christmas will come again and I will continue to keep it stress free.

Time spent together is better then money spent on each other

Maybe next year there will be a big dinner but I don't get stressed about having people over either. I enjoy good tidings and fun.

Avoid the Christmas let down by keeping things normal and keep your focus on what is important. The stuff isn't, the people and memories are!

Wordless Wednesday ~~~~ Lil Squish & Pots

Mama's tips for travelling sucess

We just completed what I refer to as the EPIC EXTRAVAGANZA. What else could you call a road trip where you drive 4 province and 13 sates in just 17 days? I call it epic especially when you do it with three young children. It is amazing how many people look at me like I am or at was completely nuts. I may possibly be but that is another topic completely. You know what we survived and with our family intact. There are no hurt feeling and no damaging arguments. It was a really good time. So after people hear about this usually they want to know my secret. How much did you drug them? Nope. Did they watch movies and play video games the whole way? They had one maybe two movies a day and 20 minutes each on the leapster. Next the baffled look came.Always with the baffled look. So here is Mama's tips for travelling success

Frequent quick stops. Do they need to pee? Find a rest stop or at least a good pull out and everyone get out. Run play tag, get the blood flowing do a few jumping jacks have a race. Exercise increases endorphins.  Endorphin help make you happy. Fresh air can do wonders as well.

Something new. We got the kids new colouring books a lapboard and new markers. We went for the Colour Wonder stuff from Crayola. This was amazing It kept the boys busy. I never buy this for them regularly, they are fine using regular felts at home. But I had no desire to have a colouring war in the van.

Keep it fun. If it isn't interesting kids are going to get bored and make things a bit more unenjoyable. The mood tend to set the attitude. So if the mood goes down try and increase it, put on some good music sing be silly. It is really okay to be silly as an adult, we don't do it enough.

Pack good snacks. Sure treats are great to get them to shhh! for a bit but then they want more and the sugary treats aren't good for you or your children. Pack stuff that keep hunger at bay, and is easy to eat. Fruit cups aren't really a good idea but dehydrated fruit is excellent. Now I know regular diet goes out the window but there are good quick options.

Talk it up. The kids knew that we were going on this road trip. They were told it was going to take long drives, but they also knew about the fun things we were going to do. Every stop had something interesting for the children, even if it was just a campground with a pool and a playground. They knew there was something exciting at the end of the road.

Their opinion counts. Ask your kids if they are enjoying the trip. If they aren't ask them why not? Ask them if there is something that can be done to help them enjoy the trip more? Now you don't have to change your entire trip around your children but they need to know that you care about their opinion. Understand why they aren't having fun. On the same token if they are having fun engage them in conversation about what they like. That way if things turn and they said they didn't enjoy anything you have a conversation to go back to.


So there it is pretty simple.If all else fails the DVD player is still there but I think everyone enjoys the trip more if you engage with one another.

To share or not to share

Okay I love sharing I promote it regularly. I encourage sharing with my children, I want them to be willing to share their toys. Sharing is great, but the way sharing is taught by many parents is not. Yup pull out that shocked face as I discuss how I don't like the general way sharing is taught in our society.


Picture this if you will you have your child nicely playing with a toy they are as happy as can be. Another kid comes over and decided that they want that toy. They try to take it from your child, they are unsuccessful so they start to cry. Now you step in and tell your child that they need to share, and give the toy to the other child. o_O oookay please can anyone tell me how this is teaching children to share?!?!?!? In all serious I see this everywhere. You know what this is teaching children. That whining gets them what they want. Don't give the "oh they are just kids and I don't want my child to be greedy and selfish" Uh yea you must that is what you are teaching them. Sharing is not just giving up your stuff when someone asks for it. Sharing is not going over and demanding someone give you their stuff because you want it. It doesn't fly in the adult world why should it be what is expected of kids.
Children need to learn how to share. They really do, we are by nature generally pretty self absorbed. Little psychology lesson here. ( I like that kind of stuff)  When we are born we are primary controlled by our Id. It is our primary system that is pleasure driven and self satisfying. What the Id wants the Id gets. It seeks immediate satisfaction, it doesn't focus on morality. Once they become a bit older, around 3, our Ego develops. ( not to be confused with what were refer to  as pride and lacking of humility in many people ) This is where reality sneaks in and they become more aware of what life is outside of their own means. It acknowledges outside forces on their world and can use them. Next you have your Super Ego, also can be referred to as consciousness. Here is where our children are aware of the outside factors and actually care about cause and effect. So here is when you child is going acknowledge sharing and how it effects others. This will being to happen around 5.  Please note the word BEGIN! This is developmental it takes time, patience, loving behavior, and modelling.
Now of course you start younger with your children, in teaching sharing behavior. There are a few things to think about. 
Look at age. Kids develop in stages expecting kids younger then 2.5 to share readily is a bit unrealistic. They are still in their primal stages and they see their belongings and know it is theirs. Do you give your stuff away to anyone who walks by and thinks its nice? No? Well why the heck not, that's sharing isn't it? No? Why expect that of your child? Children will grow and develop in different stages,  sharing will come in time, usually.


Acknowledge the item of issue If your child has special toys or things that are new to them? These are likely toys that will be issue toys. New toys are awesome, everyone wants to play with them. For some kids that can be an issue they maybe don't want to share their brand new toy with others. They fear things getting lost or broken and that needs to be acknowledged. The same goes for their special toys. They should probably be put away for play times with others or not brought into play groups and such. Yes sometimes they will not separate from that special item, and you will have to be their voice letting others know that it is not a sharing item.


Choices Sometimes kids just don't want to share, it happens. Most adults don't want to share either. I want my children to be better than the general populous, so I encourage them to think of others, in regards to sharing. If they don't want to share an item I ask them to think about how they would feel. I do not force them to share. I ask them to think and then they can either choose to share or offer the other person a choice of another object. There are always choice is the matter, and your child deserves a choice. By giving choice you are allowing you child the ability to think about why they share, how sharing can make them and other feel. 




Now I feel that sharing is important and it needs to be taught. It does not need to be bullied into children though. True sharing with empathy and thought needs to be modeled and explained to our children. That is this Mama's thoughts. How do you teach sharing in your home?

Too Many Toys

 I find it amazing how toys grow. I am pretty sure they toys are ....um....having relations in the playroom Every.Single.Night. Seriously the kids have toys that I have never seen. I don't know where they came from or when they showed up. Before you start thinking that my kids are taking toys, they aren't people just give them stuff all the time. Their babysitter always has something for them whenever she comes over.

So last night I went through the toys there were just getting to be too much. We don't really do big toys, but it is the little ones that grow.  I couldn't believe it when I dumped everything out at the mound of stuff there was.


So what did I do, I purged. I do it about once a year and cut things down. I always ask the boys first before I do it. I let them know that it is time to give some of our toys to other children who need toys. They have been good so far and I always keep the stuff for a bit of let them see the purge bin. It's also not just their stuff going I give our stuff away to and they know about donating to those in need. They also know Mom is more willing for stuff to come in when lots goes out!

I have this pretty fantasy in my head where they are few toys and my children play with wooden toys and silk scarves, very Waldorfy. Unfortunately it just isn't a reality, my kids like plastic. sure they like the wooden toys and silk scarves but they like the branding too!. I can't win them all so I just keep it limited.