Call to Moms of Boys!!!!

We need to help our boys!
We need to have our boys know that they are good human beings!

With all the news of rape this past few days it is appalling the rape culture we live in. The confusion between what is and isn't consent. The lack of respect for another person just is wrong.

As mothers of boys we have a responsibility to raise up boys that quash this stereo type. We have to talk to our boys. We need to love them and we need to show them how to love others. We need to teach them about respect for them selves and others. We have to tell them that they are responsible for their actions, right from an early age.

It more then teaching them about sex and that when a girl says no to stop. It is so much more than that. The respect needs to start before. It is not just about saying no or yes it is about the respect that is mutually there before sex even come up.

We have a stigma that needs to be changed and it needs to change with the boys. For years we have been attacking girls telling them that they must act differently, dress differently, just be different so they didn't lure our men into situations where they would rape them. Yes things need to change, but how about giving our men some control and telling them that they are responsible. I don't know of a woman who gets dressed in the morning with the thought of " This is so going to get me raped, this is what I am going to wear today!"

Accountability needs to be on both parties some times but really there needs to be a really big change on the male half. They need to know that no matter how much money they spend how much they are attracted to her, there is never NEVER EVER an excuse to take something that does not belong to you. Just to also clarify, since we don't have slavery, she doesn't belong to you!

Moms we need to help our boys. They are going into a world where in general it is believed that all men are potential rapists. How are we going to hep them? We can start by opening the conversation NOW! Talk to them about what is going on. It is a reality and you can't hide it. If you don't talk, someone else will and it wont always be the message you want. We need to encourage them to stand up for injustices, we need need to let them know that being a good person is good. We need to stop putting our head in the sand and thinking that it will never happen. We need to respect and love our sons enough to talk to them about this. They need to learn about sex and what is really is. We need to change this rape culture so that women can stop living in fear and men can been seen as respectable individuals.

Now I am going to have to put it out there that yes I am aware that rape goes both ways but the stats are far against the men. The discussion should be with both girls and boys, but as a mom of boys I am very passionate about working to change this world where you can effect change. I can effect change with my sons. I encourage you to do the same with your children. You will each have your own set of values and morals that works for your family. I would prefer to teach my children to wait till they can see themselves being with some that they would want to raise a family with. Everyone is different and will raise their children with their own values, but the conversation needs to start.

Sex should not be hidden away in the family setting, children should know that they can come with questions. They should have a safe environment to talk in, where they know they will get honest answers. If you don't talk they will seek out the answers, through peers and the internet. Children are resourceful they will find the answers but will they be the answers you want them to find?

Have you opened the discussion in your home?

2012 What a year!

What a year :) So much has happened in our little family is the last year.

Thinking back and reflecting on 2012. Lil Squish celebrated his first birthday and has learned so many things. He can walk, talk use a spoon, fork and a cup. He is so full of fun and it has been an amazing time, 

In April a series of events lead Hubby to getting surgery on his ankle for a bone infection, that I guess he has had for years. We are so lucky that it was finally diagnosed and the issue has been solved. So happy that he has been pain free since then, which hopefully means no more flare ups.

Home Learning was really in full swing this year. We have gone on amazing field trips, met some amazing people and looking forward to continuing on this path for us. Bug Joined beavers late last year but really has gotten into it this year. I have joined on as a colony leader who who knows how long? ;)

This summer was truly amazing  it started off with the Stampede and the 100 year celebration. Bug got to ride in the parade with Great Grandpa. We also got to go to the Ponoka Stampeded with Grandpa, the boys had so much fun with that.  We we on rides, played some games and had a blast. Nothing quite like partying cowboy style!

 After a few weeks with family in Alberta we headed home to prepare for the Epic Extravaganza. What else could you call a 17 day road trip with three children across Canada and the upper USA! 4 provinces and I think 13 states we crossed while driving. We started off the trip with Hubby and mine 10 year high school reunion, and some fun on the lake. .  Saw my sisters, they both live far away from me, and their kids. Saw Hubby's Dad & his little family,stayed with them for a few days.We went to Niagara Falls, one of my bucket list places, we even took a ride on the maid of the mist 

 We stopped to see Mount Rushmore, or the "Mountain Men" as I called the last time I saw them ( I was 4 I think) Next to Yellowstone, where we got to see Old Faithful, and buffalo. At both National parks the boys worked towards their Junior Ranger badges, and still talk about them to this day. 

Then we stopped in Salt Lake city  for the night to see the temple, So thrilled to be able to have been there as a member this time. Hopefully next time we go we can spend more time. We camped along the way with the children and yes the baby stayed in his cloth diapers for the trek. ( I have that many and with the stops at family I was able to do laundry )

Then fall came, back to reality..... and packing. You see before we left on the Epic Extravaganza we found a new home, A place that was going to meet our need more fully

I celebrated my birthday.I harvested my first successful garden. :)Then the move, I thankfully went off without a hitch. Next came the Bug and BoBo's birthdays, wow 6 & 4 I can barely believe it. November then December and I can barely believe it is over again. We have done so much this year but it still feels like 2012 just started.

I'm looking forward to 2013, I'm sure it will be amazing. We have plans and goals, I hope it works out for the best :)

Does post Christmas get you down?

The presents are opened. Thank yous are exchanged. The turkey dinner is done. The friends and family have gone home There should be a feeling of peace and happiness from everyone. Tis the season of good tiddings and all!


          But there isn't     :(


The phenomenon that I have heard referred to as  "The Christmas Letdown"

There is so much build up to Christmas months of prep hours shopping. Time spent decorating and planning, all leading up to one day. The when it is done..... now what?

Often I heard people say "never again". Though the reality is we are creatures of habit, we'll do it again just like last year and the year before.

Why do we have this desire to have one day of the year filled with presents and glitz and so much stuff? Does it make us happier? Maybe for the day but how long does it last? Far too many people have stuff of Christmas day then run out boxing day and buy more stuff. Or exchange what you didn't like to get something better.


Then you have stuff. Does the stuff make you happy? Does it fill you life with joy? Maybe it does for for now but in a week will it still be the best thing ever?

Small and simple Christmas

We really worked hard on decreasing the stuff this year. We didn't make a big deal over Christmas stuff we focused on what was important, FAMILY. It may have been just us but it was one of the best days we have had in awhile. I didn't stress over a fancy dinner, we had meatloaf.

We kept gifts to a minimum and they were mostly useful gifts, books, watches, blankets, PJ's and a few small toys. Honestly unwrapping was done in like 45 minutes. The kids were happy they got what they had wanted. I suppose I'm lucky that they didn't want much. ( definitely an advantage to no TV and homeschooling :) )
We are fortunate that our families are very understanding about our desire to keep the stuff to a minimum. They understand our desire for memories and quality over quantity. :)

Do I feel a sadness that Christmas is over? No. Why not? Because other then a few extra presents, snow and Christmas carols, and a tree we didn't do really anything major. Christmas will come again and I will continue to keep it stress free.

Time spent together is better then money spent on each other

Maybe next year there will be a big dinner but I don't get stressed about having people over either. I enjoy good tidings and fun.

Avoid the Christmas let down by keeping things normal and keep your focus on what is important. The stuff isn't, the people and memories are!

Wordless Wednesday ~~~~ Lil Squish & Pots

Wordless Wednesday ~~~~ The wonders of Science

The Rights of a Child

Today is National Child Day. Today we celebrate the rights of children.

Canada's national "Child Day" is held November 20th each year as enacted in Bill C-371, otherwise known as the  Child Day Act, by the Parliament of Canada in 1993.

It commemorates the United Nations adoption of two landmark documents concerned with the human rights of all children and youths.

On "Child Day", Canadians honour our children and The United Nations Declaration on the Rights of The Child  on November 20th, 1959, and the The United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child  on November 20th, 1989.

The Convention spells out the basic human rights to which children (under the age of 18) everywhere are entitled.

The purpose of Child Day is to promote awareness about the Convention to Canadians .

It is also a day to support Canadian children's rights by voicing your concerns about Canadian children's rights violations to the politicians of Canada and to educate our children about their rights and responsibilities.

All children have rights. More then just basic rights of food, water and shelter. Children have  the right to being cared for in a loving and understanding home, whether that be with the parents or another designated home. They have the right to social security, to grow and develop in health. I love that there are so many rights put out for our children to keep them safe and equal human beings in this world.

I feel that there are a few things more for me personally that children have rights to!

I believe all children have the right to the best food for their health, even in infancy. Yes I mean human milk, if you can't produce it there are other ways. I believe that a child owns their body, all of it even from the time they are born, they have a right to not have their bodies modified, unless truly medically necessary  I believe children have a right to be equal with all other human beings, they are not less because they are little. I believe that children have the right to be children. That means they can play, laugh, climb trees and snuggle. They have the right to learn their emotions, it is a big job and they need your loving kindness. 

Children are wonderful little gifts.  They are innocent precious souls. How you treat them will form how the new generation will be. While you must fill their rights laid out by the UN, remember to fill their rights are a person, as you expect your right to be filled.

  

Wordless Wednesday ~~~ Happy Birthday Bug and Bobo

Good food = Happy Kids

Okay so here is mama life. It's busy, yes very busy. With three children under 6, things can get a little bit hairy around here. I'm a pretty easy going mom, my house is not perfectly clean but it is tidy..... some days. Really depends on the point of the day you look at it. Right now it isn't too bad there are a few things on the floor and there is laundry to do. I do make time for important things and usually that is cooking for my kids. Now the fantasy I have in my head is where we eat all organic food, fresh from sources including milk.  I also bake all our bread products with freshly ground flour from the local organic grain store thingy. It is a really is a pretty world in my head, almost in a 50's style living, you know the "simpler times" idea from TV.

                                                      I love aprons I really would love to get one


Now  lets talk reality. Organic is expensive, and you need to be careful with green washing. Personally I rather know that my food had chemicals then think it was organic and find out I had been lied to. I really try to have the best food I can manage for my kids. I'm so fortunate the they are all good eaters, and not picky. Generally they eat whatever it is that i make for them. So we make do with what we have and that means weekly trips to the local fresh vegetable store. I like to go to the smaller places instead of the big box store. I personally find better quality fruits and vegetables there. Also I try and hit up the farmers markets when they are going on to help support the local farmers because they are the ones who really need some love. My kids like going to the farmers markets, there is always lots going on but I think they like the samples best. Heck that is why they want to go to Costco every single time we drive by.  I diverge though, good food makes for happy kids. Yes I'm sure my kids would love to gorge themselves on fast food and candy but I know what would happen after that and I just, just don't like going there. So for us real food, good food is what we try and keep in our house. Now still in that reality check here, those days happen and that is fine and dandy but just not often.
We eat a fair amount of foods in this house and I'm always trying to shake things up and make something different. I really don't like getting into a rut where I make the same thing over and over again. I like to consider myself a pretty good cook, my husband says I am so it must be true. :)
I know from my personal experience when we cut the processed junk the dyes the excessive sugar my kids are happier. We don't do much junk for the kids. Three is the odd time that we have treats but as a general we don't. I think complete denial  will just cause problems just like free range would. Indulgence seems to be a bit of a human condition.
My kids know that when we are at a party they need to pick the healthy snack first and then they can have treats. I really try to pretend that I am the mom who has the kids who always make healthy choices, but once again lets reality check. They are kids, they see other kids eating yummy treats and the treats taste good, really good. I know I want all the yummy goodness I can't expect my children to always resist but hey I teach them to make choices and you are responsible for your choices. If you gorge when mommy's back is turned and you feel sick later, that is a natural consequence.
Oh well we just keep trying but I do my best. Keep healthy options open and hide the candy, yes even from myself.